Sunday, July 12, 2015

L'Aigle Noir

When I was young, I was bullied by my stepmother for over 13 years. Between the age of 9 and 12, all I wanted was to end the torture. I attempted suicide 3 times.
I didn't know who to talk to, what to say and what to ask.
If you suffer, talk to someone you trust.
Talk to me.
This song is about a black eagle coming out of nowhere and seducing you to surrender your life. Never give up.
Quand j'étais jeune, je me suis fais maltraiter par ma belle-mère pendant presque 13 ans. Entre 9 et 12 ans, tout ce que je souhaitais était de stopper la torture. J'ai essayé de me suicider 3 fois.
Je ne savais à qui parler, quoi dire et quoi demander.
Si tu souffres, parle à quelqu'un de confiance.
Cette chanson parle d'un aigle noir qui descend de nulle part, qui nous séduit pour abandonner notre vie.
Ne laisse pas tomber.

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Ignorance is bliss

It's interesting how we take everything for granted. Back in 2013 when I got sick, I left NYC for Trenton, like it was any other day. I was in pain and my friends and students knew I was having problems, but not until I announced how bad it became.
It is now the end of May 2015, and I haven't seen most of the people I used to see on a weekly basis... Yet when we saw each other last, we said:
"See you next week!"
Not even with an hesitation on the fact that I would be so sick, that we wouldn't be able to meet ever again (Well, with some of you... It could be).
I choose to see happiness in that. It proves that overall, we are optimists, we want our friends and colleagues to succeed and to be healthy. We also count on the relationships we have and in our subconscious we love them, and accept them for what they are (the relationships).
Today I am grateful, because I have some very good friends that have shown their love and support, and still do while I am still ill. But I am also grateful for those who have ignored me, and those who believe that I am better... As long as you think I am well, it is sending good vibes to the universe for my recovery, and I thank you for ignoring me (Not that you are doing it on purpose... I know you've got a life too, and probably some problems as well, but please don't tell them to me, so I can keep a great image of you, healthy and happy.)
All that to say, that if you are reading this, you are way above the majority of people who won't even bother, since there's no picture, but know that I love you and remember that you are beautiful.
As Ellen DeGeneres says: "Be kind to one another"
And as I say: "You are beautiful, but feel free to ignore me, I appreciate your positive thoughts."